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November 17th, 2008
November 10th, 2008
06:37 pm - Trust
Trust is such a tricky business...it takes years to build and seconds to destroy
©
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October 3rd, 2008
12:17 pm - The Other Woman
Why is it always her fault? Why is it her who broke up relationship?
I mean where were you two, when she was breaking it up?
Why is it her to blame?
For what I know she is not the one who’s got that "special someone"...she is a single woman, so she can do what- or whoever she wants.
Or you don’t think he’d find somebody else to do it with if it wouldn’t be for her?
Please!
Everybody should take responsibility for their own actions!
Paradoxically, in mother-Russia he’d be forgiven by women with old-school-dark-ages view of relationship mechanism. Well of course..."he is like a child, who spilled juice all over the kitchen floor..aww...so sweet...he doesn’t know better. Or maybe so he could compare, feel the difference and come back to be best one. Besides he didn’t think straight...he was drunk, high, charmed, under jinx, spell...you name it! He is poor little confused thing...It is all HER fault!"
...huh?!
Give him a little credit, will you? Or your boyfriend is a pet with IQ of a chicken, that you adopted? And if it’s so, then how does it describe you then? You were the one who was in serious relationship with him...
I think you should thank her for showing you him in his true colors. She is the temptation if you like. The temptation he didn’t resist. But the thing is...all our life filled up with temptations, small or the big ones. Sooner is better then later, wouldn’t you say? Or maybe you’d rather find out that he is a scum after you you’d marry him and had a couple of kids, a dog and a house?
Hypothetically speaking...
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September 29th, 2008
05:52 pm - Why would she go for Cassanova guy?
I was reading my friends blogger today and came across this story about a girl who liked a Casanova guy. Yes, predictably he slept with her and never called, she went over to his place and found him in a hot tub with other woman. Later on she'd be calling my friend and cry about it. Now why would she go for him in the first place, knowing whole Casanova thing?
Here is what I think:
'Cos she thought she could change him...she was wrong but!
First of all let me tell you that women are no different from men! Everybody does it! You know why? 'Cos we all think of ourselves as low-level super-heroes in our own world. And whenever we meet somebody we like and there is something in this person doesn't suits us, then we think "Oh well... I will change it...Who else can do the magic if not me?...I will get him/her first and then it's gonna be alright". And it's not! You take it or leave it. 'Cos this kind of relationship is NEVER gonna work out.
Put yourself in that position, would you like your partner to change you? Or would you rather have him/her take you for who you are with all your luggage?
I actually know some people who got married having it in mind. Do you think they still have families?
I have dated guys, who was like: aww this whole being tough n' bitchy is just an act, but that's not who she REALLY is. Inside she is a sweet little girl...blah blah blah, I've seen it, I know!
...Uhh no you don't :) Now think logically, this "mask" of mine (or anybody else for that matter)...it couldn't be so unnatural if I'm using it, it must have come from somewhere...It is a part of me for better or worse. If you don't like it, then leave as I am not making anybody accept it against their will. But do not try to shape me into this sculpture of yours 'cos I am already a person with my own opinion.
I am in no way suggesting that you should throw it in the face of your partner every chance you get. Been there too, it is not a pretty thing. I think the road to a healthy relationship lies through the ability to compromise according to the main goal. Is like a dance: you make few steps forward, but then you make few steps backwards so your partner have the room to make steps. I think a couple should develop together as relationship grows.
But yeah...all these things are easier to say then do when it comes to it.
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June 18th, 2008
12:02 am - About true happiness
Did you honestly think that only love can be true? Well...think again.
I am not talking about thrills and excitement splashes of adrenalin rush, because those are emotions, which are unstable to begin with. I am talking about constant feeling of complete life satisfaction. So when I'm saying "true happiness", do I claim that there is untrue happiness out there as well? Am I suggesting that there are right and wrong kinds of happiness? Duh! Although I am not saying that untrue happiness is bad, I'm saying it's just not the real deal!
Here is what I think: True happiness is unconditional. It means, that your happiness does not depend on anything or anybody. Because if it does, you will never be happy, for one simple reason: anything and anybody has better things to do then sit around all day long and make you happy. They have things going on...you know...life.
The worst case scenario is when you hold somebody else responsible for your happiness without their knowledge. Imagine relationship between these two people: she is sitting around and waiting for him to make her happy, he is doing the same...Ridiculous, isn't it? What ever he would be doing to show her how he feels, would it ever be enough then? I seriously doubt that.
It's even harder when it comes to love. Especially for us - girls of 80s. We grew up with Cinderella stories about that magical day when prince Charming on a white horse comes to the rescue and movies about that crazy love, when he stops the plane with the love of his life on board and do other unpredictable things, which he would never do on normal circumstances. And most of the time we don't even have anything to be rescued from, it's just...this whole life, both good and bad is like a pre-story until The Ball with fireworks, fairy godmother and true Love's first kiss...
The day after the ball is whole other story...when everyday routine kicks in...let's see how well romance will survive in these conditions. Extreme conditions are easy - black or white, it's the gray scale of dirty socks and dishes together with habits makes my girlfriends call me, saying: "I love him...I just don't wanna live with him anymore, I can't! I wanna date him instead!"
I've noticed something ironic: when people are single, they are closer to the true happiness then they think. Because it sure sucks not having somebody who cares for you, so you kinda forced to find joy in everyday things that you already have. And one of these days you drive your car and then notice that sun is shining, birds are chirping, sky is blue, grass is green...wow, it's such a beautiful day! - you say smiling. A year later you wont even notice these things, 'cos you would be too busy being upset with that guy for not replying to the text message you sent an hour ago.
I think the best example of happiness for me would be that story my mom told me long time ago about a family that used to live in a neighborhood. They were so happy and in harmony with themselves and each other - smiling all the time, always in a good mood...that people thought they were crazy. Neighbors would forbid their kids to play with "crazy" children. 'Cos they found it way too suspicious that people can be happy all the time.
Speaking of mentally challenged, I think we should take lessons from them on how to enjoy simple things...They are like children, and children are happy to learn new things. Every day they discover something to smile about.
I am not saying that love is miserable. I am saying that love and happiness are two different things and when they go together - it's great, but one does not necessarily means another.
You yourself hold responsibility for your own happiness.
To add it all up I would like to quote two great men, who cracked that puzzle long time before I was born :)
"Joy is not in things, it is in us" © Richard Wagner
"If you want to be happy, be it!" © Kozma Prutkov (a fictional author invented by Aleksey Tolstoy and his cousins during the later part of Nicholas I of Russia's authoritarian reign)
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June 17th, 2008
08:56 pm - Vitiligo
As you all know I have Vitiligo. For those who doesn't, read about it here . A little while ago I've started UV light treatment, which is a bullshit to begin with...but what the hell, it's free :) Doctors of the world are cracking their heads on how to fix thins thing, although not too hard - since only 1-4% of human population has it. So far I tried duckweed (lemna minor) broth - disease stopped spreading for a while. At the moment this is the only thing that gives any kind of effect. When I got back home from treatment today I thought to myself: why not spice it up a bit with some cream or pills at the same time...But since any medications have very poor effect and mostly herbs, I'm not paying if it cost too much! Simple research - they all cost like 100$ pr bottle! For what??? For herbs??? Jeez! So I'm thinking, at least I would read ingredients and when Katya will leave to Ukraine soon, I will ask her to find some sort of substitute at affordable price. Did you ever catch yourself reading ingredients on drugs? Well don't! :) So I go to this site...reading ingredients: blah, blah, blah...human placenta! Eww! Next! Blah, blah, blah...black-striped snake!!! Yuk! I'm not eating no snakes man! And so on and so forth...Thank god we don't know what the rest of the stuff we are using daily is made of! lol
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May 22nd, 2008
09:22 pm - Insurance
I was on the phone all day, trying to find best car insurance deal. Sales people were asking me all kinds of funny questions, here is the winner:
- So you say until two years ago, the car you was driving was registered to your ex-husbands name?
- Correct
- Do you know his name?
- Uhh...yeah...lol
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May 20th, 2008
02:30 am - From Russia with love!!!
Holly shit! We won! Yesterday (sunday 18th) we beat canadians and won the World Final! Yeah!
Current Mood: damn proud!
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May 18th, 2008
12:45 am - Back on the air
Finally! I got myself a "new" computer! Things are going crazy in Danish Kingdom: besides "new" computer I'm car-hunting, looking for job, eating sushi, riding bikes with Kurt and Maja (got my own helmet too ;), making new friends, visiting old ones too, reading Rumi, doing a lots of stuff and doggy-sitting once in a while :)
But enough about me, how have you been?
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April 9th, 2008
09:20 pm - Official information
My Royal Highness The Crown Princess Of Danish Kingdom is arriving to Seattle airport tomorrow evening.
Flowers, balloons and orchestra are obligatory
Ask vichka for more information.
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April 3rd, 2008
04:44 pm - We are out of hair dye
This is possible only in Russia! When you come over to hairdresser and he tells you: we are out of hair dye... and foil too! So could you be a doll and run to the store real quick to buy it? Oh, and don't forget cognac!
lol
Or did you ever run to the store to buy some bread and came back next day drunk as hell...without it? lol
Oh I surely miss motherland :) That russian comedian was so right when he was saying: I don't wanna live abroad! It's too damn boring! It's much easier to find adventures by walking around the block in Russia for 20 minutes, than by living for a year in any civilized european country :)
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/bitospud/courier/black/amused.gif) amused
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March 29th, 2008
March 27th, 2008
06:05 pm - About motivation
I always thought of motivation as positive event. Without it no dreams would come true. And I am not talking about sick stuff like motivation for murders or child molesters to be that way, but more like stimulation to create a better life for yourself, to reach your goals.
My friend and I were talking about this subject and here is what she thinks: let's say your goal in relationship is stability and your reason for it is to avoid dependency, geographical distance and major differences, basically to avoid instability. If that's the case, then nothing good will come out of it because your motivation is fear, which is rather destructive then creative.
As scary as it sounds, why is it necessarily bad? I've heard of people who had reached their goals without having a specific picture of how their future should look like, they just desperately didn't wanna be at the place where they were. Here is example from my personal experience: I was working at the dairy plant, making cheese. My job was to pack it to smaller boxes. The woman working next to me was celebrating her 20th anniversary at the plant and that's where it hit me! 20 years of slicing cheese! Didn't she have any goals, dreams? Come on! That's when I knew that I don't wanna end up like this. There is no way I'm gonna spend my life packing cheese! So I got into university. Hell yeah, my motivation was fear! And I'm sure that Indira Gandhi and mother Teresa had very creative goals, but maybe before they had realized them, they also just wanted something better?
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